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Bay Area Pun-Off, part deux: Get Thee Back to a Punnery

The heart of a pun is our appreciation of polysemy - the coexistence of many possible meanings for a word or phrase. Unlike other forms of wordplay, this one is particularly adept at eliciting the comedian's blue diamond, perfect barrel, mount Everest...: the ever illusive facepalm+groan combo.
We saw quite a few of those go by at the first pun-off and, hoarse, ney, HORSE, from laughing, our Gallup polls show this could be even worse. Er... better!
Doors open at 6:00, events start at 7pm
Please note: 
Competitors must show up by the start time in order to participate.

Inspired by the O-Henry Punoff ( and quickly taking on a shape of it's own...

Prepared Pun Constestants will compete throughout the evening, punning on a topic of their choosing - for up to 2 minutes. (After 2 minutes, there'll be a crook and the music will swell until it drowns you out...)
Punslingers will go head to head with fellow punsters in back and forth rounds of punning within a given category with only 5 seconds (*gasp!) between each pun. There will be several elimination rounds and only one punster will remain!
We're also considering a surprise event... be ready for ANYTHING!
Remember, at the pun-off, puns don't have to be funny or even good, they just have to be puns.